It’s a strange feeling – not easy to describe. When your ex moves on in life before you do, you may feel left out, confused, not sure whether to be happy or jealous. You’ll smile and tell the world you are happy for her, but deep down you know you are rattled. You may have mixed feelings, but most of it is not very pleasant.
If it is getting difficult for you to accept the news, you are not alone. Many men and women need help coping with it when their ex-wife or husband starts a new relationship. But, don’t worry! There are ways to deal with the situation. It is all about getting your mindset right. Here are some tips on how to deal with the situation better.
Accept the situation
Understand that it’s a challenging situation, not only for you but also for your ex and your kids. While you are concerned about her moving on, she may be concerned about coping with a new relationship. She must be concerned about the kids too. She may even be worried about you. Your children, on the other hand, may feel deprived, left out, and insecure. It is your responsibility now to support your kids at this phase in their life. If they see you unhappy, they may feel more insecure and worried. So accept the situation gracefully. Be strong and tell your kids, “It’s not the end of the world.”
Think about the reasons of your divorce
There must be some reasons why the relationship between you and your ex did not last. Think about those reasons. Maybe your spouse cheated on you. Or perhaps, you were not happy about the way she used to behave with you or your relatives. Whatever the reasons are; you and your spouse decided to end the marriage together. So why are you bothered now that your partner is moving on in life? After all, it was a decision taken mutually. Isn’t it? Remember, you hired a divorce lawyer and had long hours of discussion on how to get the job done. If you think about the reasons of your divorce, it may help you deal with the situation better.
Consider what you want in life
You know you don’t want to live the rest of your life with her, but you do not like seeing her with someone else. If this sounds similar, the problem is in the way you think. Instead of focusing on her, put the focus on you.
Think about your life. Will be happy in life with her? Maybe not – that’s exactly why you decided to hire a divorce lawyer. Nothing has changed since then. So simply ignore her. Concentrate on your life. It is time for you to do things that you always wanted to do in life, but could not do earlier. Maybe you are passionate about music or paintings. Or perhaps, you want to learn coding or start a new business. Now is the time to focus on your work and hobbies. Don’t rush into a new relationship. Take your time and let any relationship happen naturally.