You never know when you’ll find yourself facing a divorce case, but you’re brave enough to face the consequences, unlike your children. Divorce does affect the spouses but it affects children of divorce more than anyone. It changes their way of thinking, their perception, and their entire personality. Even at the time when couples dealing with divorce, consult divorce lawyer, they tend to forget the basic necessities of their children.
According to Wallerstein, 1/3rd of kids of divorce were found to do well initially, but as they reached the age of 10, they showed rather poor results.
Some of the issues include:
- Poor functioning
- Moderate depression
- Poor learning
- Acute unhappiness
- Intense anger
- Drug abuse
- Sexual promiscuity
Most of these issues happened because their parents did not pay them the attention they actually deserved. In fact, 25% of the divorce children think they get help from a family member whereas 10% of them think they are helped by an outsider.
WHY DO SUCH PROBLEMS OCCUR?
ACT OF VIOLENCE
Apart from the main fact that parents care less about their children after divorce, one major reason is that 50% of these children saw at least one act of violence within their families after divorce.
Most of these acts happen when ex-spouses meet and talk about their differences. They tend to forget they have little brains and eyes around them. Children do take these instances seriously.
- Some of them grow up having hatred for the opposite sex.
- Some children of divorce are fearful enough to talk to their family members.
- One of the most recurring results has been the lack of trust and confidence on others.
LESS COMMUNICATION BETWEEN DIVORCED PARENTS
Studies have shown that parent’s behavior change dramatically from the first year of divorce onward. There are two main reasons for that:
- Majority of divorced couples give more importance to their ego and emotions rather than their children. They are not capable of communicating courteously. They don’t discuss problems pertaining with their children, thereby letting them live on their own.
- In order to start a new life, adults absorb themselves entirely overlooking the fact that they are ruining their children’s life. And when they look back at their children, they find a person full of problems.
All children need is safe and sound environment free of violence. The environment should be secure enough to give positive energy to your kids. If you’re dealing with divorce, give preference to your children and their problems rather than wondering too much about how you’re going to pay the divorce fees.
MARRIAGE AFTER DIVORCE
Studies indicate that 80% of divorced parents re-marry which makes life a little more complicated for step-children. In 60% situations, divorced parents cannot save their second or third marriage and end up piling up problems for themselves and for their children.
Best thing to avoid another divorce is to understand the differences between you and your new spouse. You should also learn from the past to avoid the similar mistake you did in your last relationship.